We live in a sinful, fallen world.
Men are
growing up seeing a tainted image of what a man looks like, what a father looks
like, and what a husband looks like.
Women are growing up with a tainted image of what a woman looks like.
Our enemy – the spiritual forces of evil in this world, organized by Satan –
has been hard at work for millennia gradually chipping away at our God-given
identities. Media makes men look weak, puts woman in charge, mocks identity
roles, and promotes people who reject their God-given identities as
heroes.
Whether due
to social pressure, parental confusion and misleading, abuse, or genetic mutation,
many men and women get confused over their identity. This confusion is not a
sin, merely an indication of the state of the world, and a personal stumbling
block for the individual. Identities can get confusing in a wide variety of
areas, not only sexual or gender; any lie that we believe affects how we view
ourselves and the world around us. If I believe that I have to measure up to a
certain performance level to be valued or “good enough” for God to love me, I
am believing a lie that is going to impact my thoughts, behavior & actions.
This impact extends to how I interact with people around me. The lies that
others believe impact how they interact with me, and can cause a chain reaction
by either feeding me new lies, or appearing to reinforce the lie I already
believe. It’s a brutal cycle.
Sadly,
gender & sexual identity lies can be among the hardest to refute.
The lie
could be planted in a young girl by her believing she can never be as feminine
as a mother/teacher/supermodel who defines in her mind what a woman should be.
It could be planted in a boy by teasing friends who suggest he isn’t manly
enough. Sometimes, I suspect, someone with a strong desire for physical touch
misinterprets the love they feel when a friend, coach or family member hugs or
wrestles them. The possibilities are endless – but it’s important to understand
the underlying reason is a lie, a stronghold that has taken root in their mind
& heart. The longer it sits there unrecognized, the more it gradually
poisons the heart & mind of the person believing it.
I highly
recommend the book The Search for Significance by Robert McGee for more
information on recognizing lies and how to conquer them.
Recognizing
that there is a lie doesn’t mean the road away from it will be easy. False
beliefs have power for a reason – we believe them! We tend to be passionate
about what we perceive as truth, and it’s difficult to rewrite our mindset to
replace the false belief with what is actually true. It is critical for this
process to refer to our infallible Truth – God’s Word.
The
following passages may feel long, but I encourage you to read them, putting
Paul’s words in context.
1 Timothy 1:3-17
3 As I urged you when I went into Macedonia, stay there in Ephesus
so that you may command certain people not to teach false doctrines any longer 4 or to devote themselves to myths and endless
genealogies. Such things promote controversial speculations rather than
advancing God’s work—which is by faith. 5 The goal
of this command is love, which comes from a pure heart and a good conscience
and a sincere faith. 6 Some have departed from
these and have turned to meaningless talk. 7 They
want to be teachers of the law, but they do not know what they are talking
about or what they so confidently affirm.
8 We know that the law is good if one uses it properly. 9 We also know that the law is made not for the
righteous but for lawbreakers and rebels, the ungodly and sinful, the unholy
and irreligious, for those who kill their fathers or mothers, for murderers, 10 for the sexually immoral, for those practicing
homosexuality, for slave traders and liars and perjurers—and for whatever else
is contrary to the sound doctrine 11 that conforms
to the gospel concerning the glory of the blessed God, which he entrusted to
me.
12 I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he
considered me trustworthy, appointing me to his service. 13 Even
though I was once a blasphemer and a persecutor and a violent man, I was shown
mercy because I acted in ignorance and unbelief. 14 The
grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly, along with the faith and
love that are in Christ Jesus.
15 Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ
Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst. 16 But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in
me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience as an
example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life. 17 Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only
God, be honor and glory for ever and ever. Amen.
1 Corinthians 6:9-20
Or do you not know that the
unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither
the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice
homosexuality, 10 nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor
drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. 11 And such were some of you. But you were washed, you
were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by
the Spirit of our God.
12 “All things are lawful for me,” but not all things are helpful.
“All things are lawful for me,” but I will not be dominated by anything. 13 “Food is meant for the stomach and the stomach for
food”—and God will destroy both one and the other. The body is not meant for
sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. 14 And God raised the Lord and will also raise us up by
his power. 15 Do you not know that your bodies are
members of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them
members of a prostitute? Never! 16 Or do you not
know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For, as
it is written, “The two will become one flesh.” 17 But
he who is joined to the Lord becomes one spirit with him. 18 Flee
from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body,
but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. 19 Or
do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom
you have from God? You are not your own, 20 for
you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.
Too many
people have read key verses in the Bible and walked away believing the “God
hates gay people” lie. The Old Testament had strict laws and was much harsher
because it was required for people to work to live a holy righteous life in
order to have favor with God. The New Testament, however, brought grace. We
need to be continuing on in the daily process of sanctification – becoming like
Christ to glorify God – but God sees us as holy once we have confessed our sin
and received Jesus as our Lord & Savior. All sin, be it homosexuality,
pride, murder, lying, or selfishness drives a wedge between us and God. All are
forgiven when we accept our new life as a child of God.
It is also
extremely important to note that in both 1 Timothy & 1 Corinthians, Paul
specifically stated, “those who practice
homosexuality…” The temptation itself is not a sin. Even Jesus was tempted
while He was on earth! Temptation is not easy to fight off, but God has
promised to always give us the strength when we seek Him for it. What becomes
sin, however, is indulging in the mental thoughts, fantasying about the
concept, and physically acting them out. Lust is a sin, whether it’s
heterosexual or homosexual. God created sex for within the confines of a
one-man one-woman marriage ONLY. All other expressions of it (adultery,
fornication, pornography, etc) are all sin.
As I covered
before, I believe that sexual sins are all the more repulsive in God’s eyes
because of the beauty and imagery that marriage is to our relationship with
Christ. Forgivable, yes – but God hates
the action. And it is exactly because of how special marriage is to God that
Satan works so hard to pervert it. Homosexual behavior is the pinnacle of
mockery of God’s design.
One of the
traps that we have fallen into as humans is believing that our thoughts and
temptations define our identity. Many believers reach a point where they give
in and state that they “are” gay/lesbian/bi-sexual/transgendered. This is
replacing God’s true identity for them with a lie. They are a son or daughter
of the King of the Universe, their Creator, who is being tempted. They
are struggling with a lie that the enemy has fed them, but that lie does not
define who they are. I know people who
have committed adultery – their identity is not as an adulterer, but as a
Christian who committed a sin in the past and has been forgiven. They have
repented and turned away from that behavior, it is in their past, and even if
they are tempted again they have the power in Christ to walk away and focus on
their spouse. Same for people who have stolen. Same for people who have lied.
Our sin does not define us. Our temptations do not define us. We must keep our
focus on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith (Hebrews 12:2).
Hebrews 13:1-5
1 Keep on loving each other as
brothers. 2 Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some people
have entertained angels without knowing it. 3 Remember those in prison as if
you were their fellow prisoners, and those who are mistreated as if you
yourselves were suffering. 4 Marriage should be honored by all, and the
marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually
immoral. 5 Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what
you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I
forsake you."
Romans 1:26-28
26 Because of this, God gave them
over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural relations for
unnatural ones. 27 In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations
with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent
acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their
perversion. 28 Furthermore, since they did not think it worthwhile to retain
the knowledge of God, he gave them over to a depraved mind, to do what ought
not to be done.
Galatians 5:14
14 The entire law is summed up in a
single command: "Love your neighbor as yourself."
Jude 1:5-8
5 Though you already know all this, I
want to remind you that the Lord delivered his people out of Egypt, but later
destroyed those who did not believe. 6 And the angels who did not keep their
positions of authority but abandoned their own home--these he has kept in
darkness, bound with everlasting chains for judgment on the great Day. 7 In a
similar way, Sodom and Gomorrah and the surrounding towns gave themselves up to
sexual immorality and perversion. They serve as an example of those who suffer
the punishment of eternal fire. 8 In the very same way, these dreamers pollute
their own bodies, reject authority and slander celestial beings.
Mark 10:6-9
6 "But at the beginning of
creation God 'made them male and female.' 7 'For this reason a man will leave
his father and mother and be united to his wife, 8 and the two will become one
flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one. 9 Therefore what God has joined
together, let man not separate."
1 Corinthians 7:2
2 But since there is so much
immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband.
Romans 13:8-10
8 Let no debt remain outstanding,
except the continuing debt to love one another, for he who loves his fellowman
has fulfilled the law. 9 The commandments, "Do not commit adultery,"
"Do not murder," "Do not steal," "Do not covet,"
and whatever other commandment there may be, are summed up in this one rule:
"Love your neighbor as yourself." 10 Love does no harm to its
neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law.
Leviticus 18:22
" 'Do not lie with a man as one
lies with a woman; that is detestable.
1 Corinthians 6:17-20
17 But he who unites himself with the
Lord is one with him in spirit. 18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins
a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his
own body. 19 Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who
is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were
bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.
We must
never forget that our lives, thoughts, beliefs & actions absolutely have to
be grounded in Truth. It is imperative that we define Truth based not on our
experiences and what the world says, but on what God says. The Bible is our
handbook for life. Jesus is our example. If anything that we believe and
perceive to be true does not agree with what we find in Scripture, we have to
change our way of thinking. If we fail to do so, we are in danger of becoming a
false teacher ourselves.
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